Satsifaction Guaranteed by Karelia Stetz-Waters: Cis Sex Positivity
Recently, I finished Satisfaction Guaranteed by Karelia Stetz-Waters, whose title got the Alyssa Reid song stuck in my head. I thought it was good in general; I'd heard that the leads didn't have much chemistry but I tend to disagree.
The book feels like a pretty good opposites-attract story. I like that Cade is very professional, formal and stoic, and while she doesn't want or need a drastic change of lifestyle, she could use a little more personal freedom from being an accountant for her parents' art gallery. Selena is personal freedom given flesh, all burlesque outfits and paint-your-vulva(on paper, not the actual vulva(that would have been neat too though)) and doing emotionally invested portraits, generally going with the flow which extends to her relationships. She's happy this way, but having been pushed out of her artwork by the disdainful eye of a shitty ex means she could use a little love around the edges and some stability. I'm a big fan of these two, honestly. The book doesn't make it out that the way either of them are is wrong, it simply shows us that they're better together for their differences, which I love. Opposites can and do in fact attract, even when you’re gay. Wrapped into this is a plot about grieving loved ones and letting go, since Ruth, who has passed away recently, was Cade's aunt and Selena's closest friend and mentor.
I also liked the setting being centred around a sex shop, which in addition to sexual education and freedom being very cool, also gives the entire book an air of levity that it would probably falter without. Ruth has kicked the bucket; Selena and Cade must save her deeply in-debt store and house, which is pretty depressing. But then Cade opines to herself, She was so boring. Why couldn't she eat one chocolate penis to be polite? which is excellent and made me giggle just to type. The blurb makes it sound like the book will be a totally flippant romcom, and the concept sounds very depressing, but Satisfaction is well balanced and fun, and I don't think I've ever seen the word "clitoris" quite as often as I did in this. Satisfaction is the only media I’ve ever experienced that one could term a “sex comedy” that isn’t dogshit. It is fun and funny but not without emotionally meaningful moments.
Of course, a novel about a sex shop should be(and rightfully is) often about sexual education and liberation as a side theme and subplot. It mixes well with Cade being a pre-orgasm lesbian who's only ever had sex six times, and it's satisfying to watch her go from frustrated, awkward and pleasureless to really quite relaxed and happy in her sex life. Finally, she lives up to the strong, butchy “genderqueer boi” appearance. ...whatever a “genderqueer boi” actually is. I feel old.
Despite all of these praises I can sing for the novel, and here comes the kicker, I found I could never quite get 100% comfortable in its space of dazzling queer identity and sexual freedom, and really that's because Karelia Stetz-Waters' interpretation of sexual freedom is not all-inclusive. I thought the book and author's view of female sexuality entirely through the vulva, clitoris and vagina was distressing and maybe othering. I kept thinking idly about anyone who isn’t cis reading this thing.
Now, there's not really a worse faux pas than looking at a book like this, full to the brim with sex-positivity, and whining buh muh penis, even if it would not be a man’s. Thankfully, even I'm not that dense, and I'm not trying to advance “phallocentrism” here. I ain’t gonna. Look, I kind of hate dicks too, they get so much focus as the male precious meat tubes and I'm sick of it. I hope I’ve expressed enough distaste for MEN and their precious meat tubes, both in this post and others, but hear me out. This is different.
Fact is, much of the time a trans person’s natal anatomy does not function at all like typical cis people’s. Why would it, when so often there's estrogen or only microdoses of hormones running through? Hell, or even nothing. Plus, phalli aside, I’m not really sure that Stetz-Waters’ vision of magical queer sex positivity is inclusive of anyone whose testosterone use has gifted them with the t-dick. Just some thoughts about genital diversity, really.
Satisfaction Guaranteed is exclusively focused on the cis female pussy, and I am absolutely all for a good chat about everyone's favourite opening. But as I'm reading about a sex shop decked out entirely in giant neon clitorises, or about how Cade has never really thought much about any one vag, or similar things, it's hard not to sit back and think, Oh, yeah. This isn't for me, I forgot.
The entire two mentions of trans people in the whole book—only binary trans people, sorry enbies, Waters doesn’t feel the need to acknowledge your existence—feel like brutal tokenism when the rest of the text refuses stoically to acknowledge anything but cis bodies. Cisgender female bodies are asymmetrical, different, imperfect and beautiful. This is a true sentiment and I am a big fan. Trans bodies, though? The book is clammed up on the subject, and sort of smells like vag-essentialism. The simple exclusion of trans people almost entirely speaks volumes, in the same way that an all-white cast does.
There are recommendations and a little essay-like write-up by Stetz-Waters in the back of the book, but when I look at titles like Get Clitorate, which is funny, I still wonder to myself, does any of this apply to me? Should I delete the copy of Come As You Are on my ereader? The whole unzipped-vag thing doesn't feel very inviting, at the least. It's like an exclusive club that stares at me awkwardly whenever I approach it, because I had the utter gall and bad luck to not be born cis. We should collectively delete the Y chromosome, by the way. It would solve so, so many problems.
Do I have suggestions or a solution for this issue? To be frank, I don’t know. A topic that is both difficult and personal does not make for particularly well-formed thoughts, but I felt like I should express my feelings and mood on the subject. No point keeping it all down, since I’ve probably already made tons of people mad on this blog. It’s my thing! Conversely though, this isn’t the kind of fun criticism I like. When I get huffy about novels like Something to Talk About, I’m being broadly constructive about how to improve the thing, or at least I like to think so. In this case, I’m just pouring a bucket of ice water on everyone’s fun. I’m speaking about this because nobody else seems to be, and I feel I should.
In summary, all I am asking for is inclusiveness in general. Female-centric pleasure and positivity for those of us blessed with the gift of not being a cissie. Why write something that is ridiculously queer and forward thinking and sex positive, but not for all women, y’see? Including transfemmes and enbies in general would just be a bonus, in my book.
The last time I voiced any of these thoughts anywhere on the internet, it wasn’t good. God damn, was that room silent. Got accused of phallocentrism once! That was fun! I guess it’s not surprising that sapphic romance has little room for trans peeps; that’s why you don’t see any of us knocking about, really. Shoutouts to the few transfem authors out there(Lily Seabrooke, Ryka Aoki, etc) makin’ a killing.
I felt strange about it; I had naively wondered if there would be much discussion on this subject online, but as I mentioned before, the internet at large fails me. Several pages through various search engines brought me a total of three reviews/discussions that even come close to touching on the topic. There is Underthecoversbookblog, who notes that the novel has a big theme of accepting and loving yourself, even when you’re different or think less of yourself. ...yes, unless you are trans, in which case you are SOL.
There is Smart Bitches Trashy Books, a generally excellent blog who observes that Selena’s process “beautifully mirrors the defensiveness many of us initially feel when it’s pointed out that a space that feels safe and welcoming to us, doesn’t feel inclusive to others.” Is that irony? I sure got a dry, callous chuckle out of that. I wonder if anyone feels that this book is a safe and welcoming space for them, and if they’ll be bothered by this review. Part of me hopes so!
The one blessed blog that I found that even touched the subject directly was Love In Panels, and their quote is as such;
“There's a lot talk about anatomy: vulvas, vaginas, clitorises (clitori?). There are mentions of trans folks in the book, but it's very much a "love your vulva" vibe and I assume AFAB folks with dysphoria won't enjoy this book. As a cis woman I appreciated the consistent use of correct words. (You don't wax your vagina, FFS.) Selena holds a Paint Your Vulva evening at the shop and the name she has given to her vulva is mentioned many times. It's vulva-riffic.”
But that is an understatement, really. Also, only trans men and AFAB enbies exist :) so hi, trans women and amab enbies of all forms, let’s hang out.
The vibe I get from Satisfaction Guaranteed is this; sex positivity is not for us. If it exists for us anywhere in media, I cannot see it. Has anyone actually been brave enough to tackle trans sex positivity on page? I can think of a few cool novels with trans protags that are fun, but that’s all. I would adore to see it. Satisfaction Guaranteed just bothered me.
I suppose you can’t expect all that much from cis authors, can you? I was going to cite Chelsea M Cameron’s Double Exposure as one of the few times a cisgender writer has tried to stumble into trans representation(it’s a good effort at least), but I see She/They on the website, so. I have that oops occasionally; my boomer brain still wants to assume that anybody writing dyke romance is themselves a woman and probably cis. Silly old assumptions!
Are the cissies allergic to having trans characters on page? Are they afraid to upset and offend people? I understand that second one, but frankly, what I got with this one was way worse than bad rep. It’s not like being weird about trans subject matter has any repercussions; look at JKR! That awful slime still makes money! I’m sure it’s not that dangerous to slip up regarding trans rep. If it counts, I’ll support and encourage you, poor cissies! I promise!
Someday, someone will write a shitload of trans romance with tons of positivity and vibes. I still have a potential few such examples to read, so I might find something to praise yet. Elsewise, I may have to write it myself. Hell, maybe I should, since many queer/women’s spaces seem intent on ignoring trans people. More generally, that’s why I still felt the need to speak up about this; to be the one voice in the room complaining, since nobody else seems to want to.
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